My two cents for DIY brides – Part 1

Ok, so my friend’s sister comes to visit me to discuss my wedding photography services. Suddenly, I have a flashback to when I first saw her. She was a little girl at the airport on her way to the big apple sobbing on my friend’s arms. The little girl turned into a beautiful and wonderful woman, and I’m thrilled to see her getting married to a very good man. And I’m honored that she is trusting me with her wedding photography.

We sit down and start discussing her wedding plans. She wants a small and intimated wedding, low key, but romantic and cozy, the perfect combination for a divine wedding. I’m thrilled to hear her plans. She continues. Since she has a small guest list, she can’t really go to a venue because they have a minimum. But, she found this gorgeous arboretum with a beautiful Victorian house to host her wedding, and as a photographer, I can’t think of a more romantic place to take pictures. She also found the perfect caterer and florist. Regarding music, she decided to go the ipod way because many of her guests do not dance. At least, she thinks that. Her plan is to set up a very nice playlist and connect the ipod to the speakers. That led Danny and I to lecture her about the importance of a DJ and MC, and I think we scared her, at least a bit. She hadn’t really though about that, and I don’t blame her. Many brides are doing this for the first time.

This is the moment when it hits me. Sometimes, DIY brides forego a vendor, not because they don’t value them, as some industry experts suggest; it is because they don’t know their value. And I’ve seen it before.

I remember arriving at a wedding to start getting pictures of the bride getting ready, only to see her rushing and tiding up, from centerpieces and tables to her daughter’s shoes. After she made sure everything was in order, she took a deep breath, looked at me and asked me “how did you do it?” referring to my wedding. I responded “I did it at a venue, and they took care of everything for me.” Her look told me “I should have done that.” It sure was a beautiful wedding, intimate, with delicious food and great music, but I will never forget her sight of relief once she finished tiding up.

So here are my two cents for any DIY bride and groom out there. Ask yourselves this: What is the most important thing for us on our wedding day? If your answer is: to share our love and enjoy our wedding. Then, it may be good idea to revaluate what vendor you are foregoing, and what you may need to compensate for the absence of one of more professionals.

If you decide to have your wedding at your house because you have a beautiful garden and  have always dreamed of getting married there; that’s terrific, but since you are not going to have it at a professional venue, you may want to consider hiring a wedding planner. If you decide to go the ipod way, which I am not advocating, you may want to consider looking for an MC.

Also bare in mind that some professionals are irreplaceable. So if you decide to go the DIY way, my advice is that you first learn the value of each service, and by value, I don’t mean price, but what they bring to the table, and what your wedding will be, with and without them, so that you can make an informed decision of what you can and cannot do.

And remember the most important thing of all: Enjoy your wedding.